After the morning email from Cecil, The Boss was even more convinced that something wasn’t quite right. There was no way that his beloved stapler would act with such hubris, apathetic to The Boss’ pleas for his safe and immediate return!
“Cecil is NOT a narcissist!” The Boss exclaimed to all within earshot.
Unfortunately for The Boss, an early afternoon email from Cecil seemed to further document the blatant disregard that guided Cecil’s every adventure.
Dear The Boss,
Last night got kinda crazy. I took the car out and the female staplers loved the convertible even though it was pretty cold last night. We went out bar hopping and surprisingly this town is a pretty happening place on a Monday night (Can’t wait to see how it is the rest of the week). In any event I don’t think I can really get into great detail about how my night went but needless to say some magazine journalist showed up and things got a little out of hand. I will be reading the paper tomorrow to see if I made the news or set any new trends.
I think I am going to relax today and recover from last night’s activities. I will probably be hanging out in the game room since it is so quiet and has so many things to do. Nothing like playing video games and shooting some hoops to sweat out the alcohol from last night’s bender.
Sincerely,
Cecil B. Swingline
Fits of anger could be heard emanating from The Boss’ office, a sure sign of the arrival and viewing of the message from Cecil. The maelstrom began when more photos arrived documenting Cecil’s coming-of-staplerhood.
No one was sure how much more The Boss could take…
Cecil’s Night Out is the latest installment in the Cecil B. Swingline Chronicles. The stories recounted are true. The names have been changed to protect the guilty…and the innocent.
